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This looks funny, the cringe worthy type funny, but funny none the less
Steez….
Had a good date with Ozzie last night!
Did you text her yet???
Haha better wait a day so you dont seem so keen!
Rofl
thanks for the advise guys!! Its been a while since I’ve been on a first date
No need to wait to text and show intent - you’ve announced it on the interwebs!
You luvre me!!!
Deano, calm down mate, I know your getting a little hot n flustered reading that chat
In the beginning God covered the earth with broccoli, cauliflower and spinach combined with an abundance of green, yellow and red vegetables and fruit. He did this so man and woman would live long and healthy lives.
Then, using God’s bountiful gifts, Satan created sweet treats and ice cream. And Satan said “Do you want hot fudge with that?” and man said “Yes”. And woman said “I’ll have one too with sprinkles”. And lo and behold they gained 10 pounds.
And so God created the healthful yoghurt that woman might keep the figure that man found so fair. And Satan bought forth white flour from the wheat and sugar from the cane and woman went from size 10 to size 18.
So God said “Try my fresh green garden salad’. And Satan presented gourmet cheese dressing and garlic toast on the side. The man and woman unfastened their belts following the repast.
God then said ” I have sent you heart-healthy vegetables and olive oil in which to cook them”. And Satan brought forth deep fried calamari rings, butter-dipped lobster chunks and fried chicken so big it needed its own platter. And man’s cholesterol went through the roof.
Then God brought forth the potato, naturally low in fat and brimming with potassium and good nutrition. Then Satan peeled off the healthful skin, sliced the starchy centre into chips and deep-fried them in animal fats adding copious amounts of salt. And man packed on more pounds.
God then brought forth running shoes so that his children might lose those extra pounds. And Satan introduced cable TV with remote control so man would not have to toil changing the channels. And man and woman laughed and cried before the flickering light and started wearing stretchy lycra jogging suits.
God then gave lean beef so man might consume fewer calories and still satisfy his appetite. And Satan created fast foods and double cheeseburgers. Then Satan said “You want fries with that?” And man replied “Yes, supersize them.” And Satan said “It is good”. And man and woman went into cardiac arrest.
God sighed, and created quadruple by-pass surgery.
Satan chuckled, and created the public health system.
Steez….
Like a BOSS!!!!!
When I first met Mudhoney at Hotham a few seasons back I asked him “What is your name?” “Mud” the new guy replied.
I said nah mate, you’re at Hotham now “Look, I know that you rode at Buller & Baw Baw before, but at Hotham we don’t call anyone by their first name! Its all about the surname” I said. “I refer to my riding buddies by their last name only - Prancer, Kuma, Shrimmer - that’s all. Now that we got that straight, what is your last name?” The new guy sighed and said, “Honey. My name is Mud Honey.” Then I said, “Okay, Muddy, lets go riding…”